The Female Double Standard I Hate the Most: Breast Size
Updated: Aug 28
As a female, we live and face many double standards everyday. One that seems to rarely get talked about is breast size. It's a shame that we live in a world that constantly judges, criticizes, and wants to change the way a woman looks. Why should the size of our breasts have to dictate what we should wear and how attractive we are? We need to start embracing everyone’s body, no matter what size you are and that includes breasts. Why shame a female for her breast size? For something she can't control? It makes absolutely no sense.
All of my life I have felt that I had to be very conscious on what I wore to work. I always make an effort to make sure my breasts were completely covered up at any work event or at the office. I don't want anyone at work to see any cleavage or know that I have larger breasts. Why do I feel like I have to?
Photo credit: Busty Girl Comics
Let's start with this picture below that I posted on my Instagram and Facebook last summer.
A few days after I posted not thinking anything of it, I find out one of my family members apparently sent it to my GRANDMOTHER who doesn't even use any type of social media. It was clearly sent out of judgement and basically to say "I can't believe your granddaughter would post this." Are you serious? I'm being judged by posting a picture I thought I looked great in. NEWSFLASH - I am wearing a one-piece and sitting on the beach. What is so bad about that?
I found out because my grandmother called my mom asking if she knew I posted this so-called picture. My mom calls and tells me. She sounded concerned and angry at first, until I told her "Mom, you literally liked the picture yesterday..." The next time I saw my grandmother in person, she said she had to talk to me and said that she had seen a picture I had recently posted. I knew what she was talking about and I responded with "So...?" She goes "is that what you always wear to the beach?" I said "Actually, no I normally wear a bikini, but this was a one-piece I got at a summer swim launch that I wanted to wear for my birthday. It was perfect since it was covered in sequins." She ends up saying "Oh okay, well you looked good!" So, after all the trouble she ends up actually liking it?
I can't help what my body looks like. This is how I was born and I would like to embrace my body. I shouldn't have to hide in my swimsuit cover-up because I don't want to be looked at or judged. I want to feel happy in my body just like every other female. Oh, and heaven forbid I attempt to put pasties on my nipples and nothing else on my top side like so many girls do at Coachella. That would be classified as totally inappropriate for me, but girls with no boobs it's fine.
I hate how if you have smaller breasts and wear a shirt that shows cleavage it's perfectly fine and you look cute/stylist. However, if you have large breasts and and wear a low-cut shirt, you are slut-shamed and defined as skanky just from how your body is. I can literally wear the same exact outfit as someone who is stick thin with no chest and I would be classified as vulgar and provocative. How is this even a norm?
In these two pictures I'm wearing the same shirt as famous Tik Tok Star, Addison Rae. Looks fine right? Well....fast foward to me doing a tik tok in this outfit for an artist's new song that was just released. That music artists' team basically said that I looked inappropriate and "wanted to make it more PG." So, in order to repost my dance it had to look like this.
And here is the original video I posted on my feed....
One of my favorite Instagram influencers, Lindsey Pelas, talks about this double standard a lot. I started following her, because we have similar bodies and I love how she promotes self-love. She embraces her body and encourages me to do the same. Lindsey refers to herself as "genetically gifted" and she embraces it! Just because she has bigger boobs does not mean she is more "skanky" than someone who is "less gifted." Side note - I ran into her at the 2018 Maxim magazine party and she looked so fab!
“A ton of social media guys are super sexy — the beautiful faces, the chiseled abs. They’re always posting shirtless pics. I’ve seen their butts online. And it’s nothing but love from women. It’s, ‘I want to marry you, I adore you.’ When a woman posts a sexy photo, there’s flattery too, but a lot of it is negativity, anger, jealousy — anything but admiration. I’ve never seen someone leave a ‘ho’ comment on a guy’s picture. Until that day, I feel like we still have work to do.”
"If I were 5-foot-10, flat-chested, and not as curvy, my photos would be artistic, but when I’m in them, they become vulgar and pornographic and overly sexual. Can’t my body be artsy and beautiful in its natural way like everyone else’s?
- Lindsey Pelas
YES! The size of your chest should no way indicate how sexual a person is. These are body parts that we were born with. I believe we need to change the current pattern of perception and judgment toward bodies. Until then, you can find me practicing self-love and continuing to spread body positivity on my social media accounts.